"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."
~ Oscar Wilde ~

"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
~ Humprey Bogart ~

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
~ Joe E Lewis ~

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
~ Ernest Hemmingway ~

"He was a wise man who invented beer."
~ Plato ~

"Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time."
~ Catherine Zandonella ~

"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
~ David Daye ~

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman ~

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin ~

"You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label."
~ Mark Twain ~

"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry ~

"I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop."
~ Noel Coward ~

"I drink to make other people interesting."
~ George Jean Nathan ~

"They who drink beer will think beer."
~ Washington Irving ~

"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
~ Ernest Hemingway (For Whom the Bell Tolls) ~